January

1. Chase got a job! So, so thankful. 

2. Cupcakes. No further explanation is necessary .

3. Going to the store. Lets be honest, any chance to get out of the house is something to be happy about. 

This past month was such a whirlwind. Honestly, it was just crazy. The lease on our apartment in Herriman ended on the 31st of December, and we weren't moving down to Logandale until the 5th, so we spend the first week of the new year living with Chase's family. No big deal, they were wonderful to have us, but 8 people under one roof can be a little overwhelming. And living out of a suitcase is definitely not my forte. But our new life plan was underway! Well, I thought it was at least. I have come to the conclusion that when we make such elaborate plans for ourselves that Heavenly Father just chuckles a bit. 'Cause let's be real, nothing turned out the way I had intended. 

This was the plan: Chase had found a potential job in St. George that was very promising that he was going to work at until he could find employment through a golf course and work under a head pro. You see, one of the main reasons we were moving was so Chase could pursue a career in golf. He wanted to get his PGA card and become a head pro. I was very supportive of his decision, and I wanted him to follow his dream. We would be living with my parents in Logandale NV, an hour south of St. George, until after Bliss was born and we were able to find an apartment in St. George. I was so thankful to my parents and their willingness to open their home to us; it took so much stress off of my already stressed-out self. The day for our big move came, and Chase got a phone call from the job we had been hoping for. Sadly for us, they would not be needing Chase. 

Okay. Perfect. We're about to move 300 some odd miles away, and we have no job. 

Of course we were disappointed, but not gonna lie, I was more mad than anything. And I'm ashamed to admit it, but part of that anger was towards my Father in Heaven. For the past few months, I had had this mind set that everything would just work out. We had been given this huge trial of losing Bliss, and I thought I was handling it pretty darn well. I didn't think the Lord would give us another trial on top of that. Really, I figured with His help everything would just happen the way I wanted it to.

Again, God laughs a little.

As I began the 6 hour drive, I called my mom. I told her that the job we had hoped for fell through. She responded optimistically, "Well we will just have to fast and pray even harder." I was already kinda mad, and that response was really the last one I wanted to hear. I didn't want to pray. I didn't want to fast. I didn't want another thing to worry about! 

We made it to Logandale, and Chase began looking for employment in St. George right away. He applied to countless different companies, introduced himself to so many managers, left resumes at every place he could possibly be qualified for, and yet we heard notthiinngggg. It was so frustrating! Weeks had passed and he was still unemployed. Finally, we got a little glimmer of hope. Chase had applied to one of the golf country clubs, and he had expressed his goals to the courses head pro. The head pro seemed interested in Chase and said that he would be in touch. About a week later Chase received and email from this head pro. After a few back and forth replies, the head pro informed Chase that this line of work had not been very lucrative in St. George for the past several years. He didn't encourage Chase to pursue it, he didn't want him to get his hopes up just to be disappointed in the long run. It was so disheartening for Chase. This was his dream. But he did have a backup plan. Chase has always been drawn to law enforcement, and thinks being a police officer is something he'd really enjoy.

Okay, here goes our plan changing some more. 

I set aside my pride and began to fast and fervently pray for guidance. After several conversations with Chase about what we should do, we decided that we should make Logandale our forever home, and Chase would apply to the Metro Police Department in Las Vegas. 

A few days after submitting his application, Chase found out that he had been accepted. He would need to complete a written and physical exam and place high enough to enter the academy which wouldn't happen for a few more weeks, but at least he had gotten the initial acceptance. Prayers answered.

Chase was still unemployed, and was in desperate need for any job he could get. He applied at our local gas station, and got the job the next day. Even more prayers answered.

I can't begin to express the amount of stress that I feel has been lifted off my shoulders. Everything was slowly falling into place. I had spent so much time this month being bitter about another added trial, when in reality, Heavenly Father was just trying to guide us down the right path. I can't help but laugh at my stubborn self. 

I don't think anything can describe what I have been taught this month better than this picture.

Here I am, this little girl with a teddy bear, or a life plan of the things I want and hope for. And my Heavenly Father is asking me to trust him, because he can make my life far greater than I could ever imagine. He knows exactly what is best for me and my family, and he just wants me to be able to take advantage of all the blessings he has in store for me. 

So no, nothing turned out the way I had originally planed, but I have learned so much in discovering this new plan. I have learned to have stronger faith. I have learned that if a prayer goes unanswered, it doesn't mean Heavenly Father is ignoring me, it means that there is something different in store for me. And today more than ever, I am thankful for unanswered prayers.